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[Well. Mr. Endless Dragon Energy certainly is looking a lot more subdued tonight. Maybe even just a little tired with the way he's staring dully at the screen, his hand moving right at the edge of the camera's view and making loud tapping noises.]

Are you kidding me with... -Oh, shit. [He blinks, looking slightly more alert. But just slightly.] That explains it. Thought I hit text. Oookay. Uh, what was I gonna...

[The view shifts as he sets the jpad down and leans out of view, but he keeps talking.]

Hey, so did anyone ever figure out why it was raining rocks that one time? Crazy. Lots of crazy stuff here.

[Aaand he's back! He takes a long, slow sip out of what looks like a shot glass and scrunches his face up a little.]

We could make it crazier. Anyone in this place know how to party? It's the weekend and now I have this big little empty house all to myself and some leftover sake - [He makes a small gesture with the glass.] - and a ton of vegetables and no way to keep on my a-game with b-ball but I got... swords now. which is cool. Nobody to teach me to use them but I got'em.

...Was b-ball baseball or was it basketball...

[The hell was he even taking about? Baby's first unsupervised drinking night is going superbly. He gazes off at nothing in particular for a long moment before remembering that it's recording, and he flashes a sloppy grin.]

Crazy wild party at Bonnnnn-tennnnnnnn Farm. No. Kaaaa-taaa-ko farm now. Ha.

[Give him another second to remember to actually cut the feed. Surely nobody in their right mind is going to show up, right? ...Right? There isn't a crazy party, only sad loneliness and a drunk, moody teenager.]

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NNGAAAAAAAAAAHHHH DON'T DO THAAAAT!!

[The surprise wears off as soon as Sasuke starts speaking but sometimes you just gotta keep yelling for frustration's sake, you know? At least he quiets down once that's out of his system. He clumsily grabs at the bottle and opens it to... pour some water into his sake glass. Cool.]

I should have figured he'd ask you to babysit me. I can handle myself.

He didn't tell me anything like that.

[ Again, rude, Kojuro! Sasuke's going to be a petty ninja and carry a (minor) grudge! He'll take vegetables without asking! ~~Even if he already did that at times... he'll continue it!~~ ]

But, hey, if you want to dissolve the Sanada-Date alliance, that's your call. I can just leave you to drink yourself into a stupor and whatever else you plan on doing. You won't ever have to see me again.

[ It's an empty threat. Even if Masamune calls it quits, Sasuke would still be keeping an eye on him from the shadows. He doesn't think this brat could make it on his own. ]

And you'd just go home too? Aah, fine by me.

[He drains the water like a shot and slams the cup down on the table, letting his head thud down on it right after. Let him just lay here miserably like a sad emo teen.]

Whatever alliance is going on, I ain't got nothing to do with it anyway. I'm not any nothing with anything where you guys are from. [...Nailed it.]

If I could go home to where I'm from, do you really think I'd be wasting my time here? I've got a war to take part in.

[ And a master to serve and protect. It'd be something else entirely if Yukimura was also here. But he's not. That said, Sasuke takes a seat and maybe tries to refill that sake cup with more water. One little cup isn't going to help much, snake. ]

Anyways, the alliance for here was Master Right Eye's idea. You can blame him for it if you want. Back home, he'll be nothing but a monkey to kill on the battlefield. That's how it goes when you're on opposite sides.

[ A ninja can't afford to be soft like that. He... he can't. ]

That reminds me... if the alliance is gone and you have nothing to do with anything we've got going on, then I'll be taking those swords.

[ That should get a fun reaction from Masamune. ~~He's not actually going to take them away...~~ ]

[That's right, isn't it. Whatever stupid petty rivalry Masamune has going on with the Yukimura he knows over a single school field, it's nothing in the face of what they must have in that other timeline. ~~Which is still stupid and petty though let's be real.~~ People really die for it. Sooner or later one of them probably will, too.

(What if it's Kojuro?)

He slides the little glass of water back and forth across part of the table, watching it with a glazed eye while Sasuke speaks. And then it stops suddenly with the mention of the swords.]

Like hell you are. [He sweeps the glass off the table and moves to shakily bring himself to this feet. Aaah, shit, it's really hitting him now!] Only way you're going to hold those is through your ribs, 'cause the only- m-monkey is- is- ugh-

[No, hold on, he needs to stumble halfway toward the sink and just

be a nasty disgusting sick mess.

Hold his hair back or something, gross. IS THAT THE REACTION YOU WANTED, SASUKE.]

Edited 2018-09-03 05:55 (UTC)

[ If it makes Masamune feel any better, Sasuke meets his end well before a number of others do ~~because damn it I refuse to headcanon Yukimura dying first even if he doesn't live for much longer after~~. Not that he knows that for certain, but Sasuke lives knowing his life will be short. He's Yukimura's shadow, his kagemusha, after all.

And no, that is not the reaction he wanted! The angry part, yes, but not the vomiting part! He going to try to impart the danger of using a sword when (And also sparing the Yukimura from that world from having to deal with an inexperienced brat with bladed weaponry when there's no need for it!) Maybe he needs to confiscate the alcohol first. ]

Goddamn it!

[ He was afraid this was going to happen. He summons a shadow clone to get an actual glass for water and a towel while he... deals with this. Sasuke brushes Masamune's hair away from his face and gives his back and little pat. ]

Just let it out. You'll feel better once it's out of your system.

[At this level of inebriation he might actually find that kind of sad, honestly. ~~Spoiler: he'd find it sad anyway but it would just be more visible.~~

But there's so many other things weighing him down right now, like the fact that he's been left all alone when Kojuro promised he'd stay until Masamune left, and Masamune's realization that he's never really been completely alone and independent, and now the tragedy of puking all over the floor and proving himself completely wrong about being able to manage himself. This miiight not be his proudest moment.

He retches a few more times, followed by a loud and miserable groan as he just gives up and leans back against Sasuke. Whatever, his dignity's gone anyway, this can't hurt him any more.]

I didn't even haaaave that muuuch... This is bullshit. Kojuro had way more. Way more...

[ The shadow clone fills the glass with water and wets the towel. The glass goes on the table; Sasuke takes the damp towel and offers it to Masamune for him to wipe his face. The clone then begins to gather things to clean up the mess. Not a pretty job but better to get this cleaned up as quickly as possible. (He's "cleaned up" worse.)

Sasuke settles down, practically on instinct, and lets Masamune sit against him. Wrong person leaning against him but the position is a familiar one to be in. Don't get used to it. Just like piggy-back privileges, cuddle privileges are for Yukimuras only. ]

He's been drinking a lot longer than you have and built up a tolerance to it. He does so with food in his stomach too.

[ He sighs and looks off into the distance. ]

You're drinking more water as soon as you feel like you can keep it down. It'll help you to not feel this in the morning.

[Don't worry, ninja cuddles are one thing he won't fight Yukimura over. The only reason he's accepting it now is because he doesn't trust his own two feet.

He accepts the cloth and drags it down his face with both hands, opening his mouth wide against it and breathing in and out and in again, because he's five.]

Whatever, I accidentally drank some actual poison once so I should be immune to boozing by aaaa hunnerd percent. At least.

[Then just keeps the cloth held there for another long moment, and when he finally lets it fall into his lap his distant, pensive gaze is a dead ringer for his otherworldly self's face.]

Even back then, if he wasn't... Ah, shit, I'm going to die here. Do I even know how to feed myself? [He does when he's sober, but...] Hey, Nin-nin, can I cook?

Edited 2018-09-05 00:02 (UTC)

[ Sasuke files away that bit of info about poisoning because wtf this kid seemed to have a more peaceful life. How did poison enter into it? That look Masamune only gives him more evidence that there's more to his life than school hijinks. ]

If only it'd work that way.

[ Forget the nonsensical questions of a drunken teen. "Nin-nin"? That's the proof that the dragon is far gone, and any actual conversation may have to wait until he's sobered up some. Even if Sasuke wanted to get some info out of him in this state (which he does not), he'd have to sift through drunken answers. ]

I'm going to pretend I didn't hear you call me that. Drink at least one glass of water and then I'll help you to bed to sleep this off. I can make you some porridge for breakfast.

[ What's wrong with him? The brat will be fine. Sasuke knows that Masamune can cook, and there's enough food here to last him for a while. He doesn't have to do all this. ]

[Even the modern carefree days of youth can't save Masamune from his family life. But that's a tale for him to keep to himself forever.

Anyway, fine, fiiine! He grumbles and makes an unenthused reaching motion toward the glass on the table.]

Okay, already. You sound like a mom too. For Sanada, right? Ha... If yours is like mine that kid's all heart and no brains.

[Wait... wasn't he not supposed to bring Yukimura up or something? Ah.]

[ ~~Fujimaru and Suzu probably got run over by cars or died in a fire or something else tragic like that. Or maybe they get to live but moved to another prefecture after some kind of grand bitty betrayal.~~

Shuffling a bit so that he can get up without causing Masamune to collapse to the floor, Sasuke makes his way to the kitchen to gather a few items. One of them is a large mixing bowl he places by Masamune's bed. Just in case. ]

Some things don't change between worlds.

[ He can't argue that Yukimura doesn't think things through and prefers to charge forward with nothing hidden. That's where Sasuke comes in, but Yukimura is going to get hurt by that heart of his someday. Besides, Kojuro was the one who didn't want Masamune to talk about Yukimura. Sasuke didn't request any such thing. (He just misses his danna like burning.) But bringing up Yukimura actually gives Sasuke an idea. ]

And you should know that I take the general's well being seriously, so maybe we can come up with a new alliance that'll benefit us both in the morning.

[ Well, actually it won't directly benefit this Sasuke much at all. ]

[~~THEY'RE JUST STUDYING ABROAD. AT DISNEY WORLD.~~

Anyway, come on, it's only because Kojuro wanted it that he even cares about screwing it up! Not enough to make a big deal about it, but it's going to sit comfortably in the back of his very fuzzy mind. And Masamune himself is going to (slooowly) go sit uncomfortably on the edge of his bed.]

Fff... Like what? He's not even here.

[In case Sasuke didn't notice! Good thing Masamune's here to helpfully point it out for him. He stares down at the mixing bowl for a moment before leaning over to grab it, turn it upside down, and... curl up with it as a pillow. It seems like the thing to do at this time.]

[ ~~AND THEY DIDN'T BOTHER TO TELL OR INVITE HIM~~

Sasuke checks to make sure that Masamune reaches the bed before starting to tidy up the table where his shadow clone left off. (Said shadow clone is probably washing out the towels he used to clean up Masamune's mess. Laundry probably needs to be done regardless.) ]

I'll teach you how to use those swords in exchange for you swearing an oath never to use them against the Yukimura Sanada in your world unless he is similarly equipped, trained, and wanting to fight.

[ He could have said "never use them against a Yukimura." However, Sasuke knows that he can't ask that. If Yukimura wants to fight, then... Sasuke really can't deny him from getting fired up. ~~Unfortunately.~~ But he can ask that any fights involving swords are on equal ground, and just like Kojuro proclaiming his loyalty to this Masamune, Sasuke is doing the same for a Yukimura he has never met. ]

But any further talk will be in the morning when you're not drunk.

[Whoa, that's it? It never even occurred to him to do that... he'd be offended that Sasuke assumes he would, but the other him probably does it all the time. What a cool guy he must be.

Well that's easy. I wasn't gonna. Where I'm from fighting isn't usually so...

[He trails off and his eye snaps wide open.]

...fun.

[Yeah... Yeah, wait a minute! All of the sudden he sits upright, practically bouncing on the bedroll.]

I could challenge him! A real fight, one-on-one! Ha-ha! Get ready, Sanada Yukimuraaaaaaaaaagghhh--

[WHOOPS. Got too excited there. At least he has the bowl right there, and his stomach's just about empty, so there's far less of a mess this time. It's still hardly an enjoyable experience though.]

[ Sasuke may have a grudge against the Masamune of his world nearly giving a killing blow to Yukimura. (And him but when does he really care about that?) He supposes he should probably sort out his feelings on the matter at some point now that it didn't happen in recent memory.

But he's also thinking about an untrained teenager wielding a sword he doesn't know how to use, showing off the sword he doesn't know how to use, and possibly injuring himself and others. Especially others. Like Yukimura.

Sasuke hates being the responsible one. So much work. ]

Okay, okay, no more talking. Rest.

[ He tries to find another large bowl and instead just brings over a trashcan, another damp rag, and another glass of water. He'll take the bowl once Masamune is finished. ]

See you in the morning.

[Oh sure, it's worthy of a whole alliance when Mitsunari goes on a muderous rampage across the country but when Masamune does it suddenly it's "foollhardy" and "something you'll regret" and "literally the same butthurt behaviour that got your father killed last time you litte shit." So that's how it is...

Well, that's some other dragon's problem. This one has had enough of this whole evening. He grumbles out some wordless whine of agreement and wipes tired tears from his eye. Fine. He'll sleep like a good kid and probably forget half of this by morning.]

[ Sasuke has an obvious Yukimura's life bias that's as easy to see as the marks on his face.

He lets Masamini sleep as long as possible. He figures the less of a hangover chance the more he sleeps, and when Masamune wakes, Sasuke will be in the middle of making that porridge for a easy on the stomach breakfast. Mr. Tori roosts in the cabin's rafters, fluffed up and using Sasuke's camouflage ~~poncho~~ cowl thing as a nest. (Sasuke doesn't live in his ninja gear 24/7, who knew?) There's probably a shadow clone doing other chores at the same time.

Efficiency or laziness or both? Either way, the jobs get done. ]

[Guess what, WE AIN'T DONE HERE YET.

Left on his own, he probably would have woken up ~~never~~ much later in the day. But the distinctive and comforting smell of cooking rice is enough to rouse him, at least enough for him to form the vague thought that it must be Kojuro cooking breakfast as usual. Followed by the much stronger, more pressing thought of how much his head is killing him.

He barely even opens his eye before squinting it tightly shut again and pressing his palm against it. He's not sure if he wants to go back to sleep or drink some water or throw up, but all of those things sound like more than he even wants to deal with right now so he just groans to announce that he is awake and in need of someone else to baby him a little.]

[ That groan is the cue that Sasuke waited for. The shadow clone takes that as his cue to check on something outside. Mr. Tori snuggles deeper into his camouflage patterned nest. Sasuke finishes chopping some ingredients on a cutting board. Then, he wipes his hands off and fills a glass of water. Sasuke walks over to Masamune. ]

I asked Doctor Harvey for something that'd help. He gave me this.

[ He hands over a small bottle of over the counter pain relievers. Sasuke couldn't find the more traditional (historical) medicines he's used to, so he had to depend on the town doctor. Masamini should consider himself lucky. The herbal medicine probably would've been bitter. ]

The porridge will be done in a little bit. How's your stomach?

[That voice isn't...

oh. Right. He remembers now. At least, he thinks he does. Masamini doesn't want to think too hard about anything right now, especially not the reason he feels like garbage in the first place.

He gropes blindly for the bottle and just holds it to his chest, keeping his eye firmly shut.]

Dunno. Head's worse. ...Did you stay all night?

[ Even if he's from the past, Sasuke's pretty sure that medicine is supposed to be taken orally and not cuddled. He doesn't press it for now. Maybe it's something that's supposed to be taken after food. And if that's the case, Doctor Harvey needed to say something about that. Sasuke has been asking himself if all the villagers suffer from some form of incompetence. It'd be easy for him to believe Harvey forgot an element in his instructions. ]

Which would you prefer, the truth or a lie?

[ Sasuke knows that he's not being fair, but really, did Masamini need to ask? Of course he has been here all night. The last thing he wanted to come back to was a dead body because he choked in his unconscious state.

He chances placing a light hand on Masamune's arm. He's there, even if he's not the person Masamune wants him to be. ]

Do you want to try sitting up in bed?

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