01 - A Knight at the Beach -

[mostsplendid]

Who: Haurchefant Greystone and you
What: Ocean frolicking. Shell collecting. S'more snacking. Star gazing.
When: All week. Next week. Haurchefant is always on the beach.
Other information: I will tread ever so carefully when it comes to FFXIV spoilers. But maybe some. Be careful.

It's hot. Haurchefant has heard stories of the sweltering heats in the deserts of Ul'dah and he suspects that it must be something akin to this. For someone who has grown somewhat acclimated to the ice and snow and the often below freezing temperatures of Coerthas... this is a dramatic change of pace.

There is a positive to all of this however. The ocean! It is a most splendid wonder. A beautiful shimmering ever moving jewel. The ocean waters were both too far and much too cold for him to ever dream of stepping a toe in but this one? It's simply splendid!

When dusk hits and the air itself cools off a bit the ocean is delightfully chilly and that seems like the best time for someone like him.

You'll likely find Haucherfant there most nights. He hasn't been here long enough to be considered a staple there but he's well on his way.

Seashells by the Seashore

It's like an unspoken treasure hunt. Each wave brings all sorts of curiosities. Shells mostly, of course. And they are of all sorts but so many he simply isn't familiar with. He even finds some star shaped creatures that are so utterly sublime! Sea creatures, that are as far away from the sky as you can get, in the shape of stars.

That's beautiful.

But there are plenty that he does know. Like washed up oysters. Or perhaps clams? He can't tell the difference. Is there a difference? Either way both can be considered tasty. And perhaps they are full of those ever precious pearls. A fine gift for any number of people.

But on top of that he's found all sorts of things that don't belong in the ocean. Or at least he certainly doesn't think so. Like... This clock on a leather band. And these cracked glasses. And these bottles! He's got a whole little pile of discovered treasures... or... trash. It's actually just trash.

Do you want to build a campfire?

Too bad. It's already done. But that's less work for you and more enjoyable fireside time. Warm as he is the light is necessary and a fierce breeze on a cool night does offer a chill. So best to keep cozy. It's no hearth in his keep but it is a fine replacement.

But even better. He has been told of a most splendid treat. S'mores! A sugared cracker. A piece of chocolate and some white blob create a most decedent piece of food. It feels so sinful yet delightfully delicious. (Which is kind of his thing.)

But there is plenty to share if you're feeling that late night sweet tooth.

Star Light Star Bright

This is not a sky he recognizes. If he was an Astrologian he'd be having a most dreadful time. There is no dragon star to pinpoint the rest of the sky with or anything like that. It's as much mystery as the rest of this place is. And there is something fascinating but altogether sad about that.

He could not see the sky too often in Ishgard or Camp Dragonhead. It's always snowing or grey storm clouds are billowing in. To see the endless pool of stars was a rare and fine treat. And he worked hard in his studies as a boy to be able to name them all. But this? This he does not know.

Beautiful as it is...

Well. He hasn't allowed himself to dwell too much on the future and what it might entail. What he may and may not see again. Nor the fact that no one will remember anything that has taken place. All these heart felt and sincere words will not remain for those that need them the most. And that is truly whom he worries for. The ones that needed to hear from him. They will be returned with the same burdens of the heart.

It leave the knight quite melancholy on this starlit evening.

Comments

[mostsplendid]

"You were an Ascian while you were a commander of Dragonhead?" The words hold a not often uttered judgement found in this particular Elezen. His people are quick to turn their noses up to all manner of person but not usually him. Such a tone is saved for the heretics running around and even then it doesn't hold the weight of disappointment he's offering his other self.

"For how long have you pretending to be knight of our family?" Still our though. They are but one and the same. The same core, as he firmly believes that's the case for these many similar individuals and why he feels such warmth and love for all the Warriors of Light. They too cannot be so different at their very center. So it is our family. Our people. Our home. At least... for now.

The other speaks of being born in darkness. But Haurchefant knows not quite enough to confirm or deny as to how that works. There must have been a time when this path was chosen, as that's how he assumes this works. You're taken over, possessed, as his Warrior's friend had been or you chose this life... he thinks. And since this other Haurchefant clearly knows who he is one has to assume he willingly walked this path of darkness. And that is crushing to know that they are capable of such utter evil.

"We wanted to be a knight. All our lives. For there was no place within that house for us. Through loneliness and ever tears we persevered. We found solace in those around us. Who took pride in who we were. Who believed in us and went on many an adventure without hesitation or dismissal. So... No never... I refuse to believe this is what we are capable of being."

[emet_selch]

It is a judgement he cannot help but hate, deep within - one he wishes could scream at the other. A deep pain within him seems to make him hiss a little. Emet-selch - well, he had pretended, for a time. But at the same time, he looked to his hands again.

"...Do you recall how we earned our title? Defending our dearest Francel from bandits. That is when I came to become Haurchefant. When his soul left before his body perished. His dreams and wishes... I held them as well. Perhaps it was similar to a stone that my Master has spoken of - but the desires of the young Haurchefant entered my very being."

[mostsplendid]

Does he recall? How could he ever forget? The memories are crystal clear despite how every action and breath were a blur at the time. He could think of nothing else but defending his dearest friend. He still has the faint scar from the arrow he took.

Dearest Francel...

Haurchefant inhales sharply at the words to this tale begin to click together. They have been thrown in a land where infinite possibilities come together. Where every Warrior of Light is a little different. Up until now the story has been somewhat familiar. But with infinite possibilities comes infinite sorrowful endings. Where things go poorly and not at all as they should.

Perhaps he falls much much sooner than intended. With nothing but a dagger and his courage it is more than likely that a terrible fate could have befallen him that day. And this time it's he that moves his hand to where the light pierced him deep and true. An ache that only talk of death really brings about.

"You did not make it that day..." And through whatever magic and evils the Ascians use a life that should not be continued to be. And such things come with a price. But to live and continue to protect those that are so precious... Is there too high a cost? Even he thinks that might be a choice he stumbles with. (If it was a choice at all.) For he would do near anything to return to the Warrior of Light's side. To ensure that their smile stays and that sadness that he's already seen does not overwhelm them. He wants to be there.

And he cannot.

"Blood is blood... I am an Elezen through and through as we are always so quick to judge." It's not really an apology. An Ascian is still an Ascian and he has a hard time still with that but... He understands. He does. Far better than he did moments ago. When explained like that and in a situation that sorrowful... Perhaps they are capable of great sins.

Being good is not always so simple.

[emet_selch]

Their injury - their latest death. If not coming here, then this body would have finally fallen. Body and soul reuniting, and then there would be no more staying near their beloved. There was no sense risking Francel, nor his Warrior of Light. With a gentle smile, though, the Ascian didn't seem to take too much offense.

At least, it would be that way if Haurchefant did not know his own face. If Haurchefant couldn't see how pained every word was, at first.

"It is more Ishgardians are quick to judge. Why, I've met some fine Gridanians who are almost as open as us two." Almost. "Why, I've met some chocobo keeper who I'd swear would fit right into House Fortemps - but that was before the failed Rejoining!" Rejoining - what Ascian call the calamities. (Sometimes, Haurchefant considered that Honoroit almost seemed to hold an older soul, but that's just a meta joke.) Haurchefant catches himself using it, however, and continues. "Ah-- when the false moon cracked open and unleashed such a dreadful Primal - and the first Warrior of Light vanished into nothingness, instead of showing the most wonderful and splendid fight anybody could ever hope for. A pity it happened at this time - I told Lahabrea not to destroy this peace at that time. But..."

Oh. Haurchefant trails off. The gossip between Ascian was of no interest, was it? It was of no import right now. After a pause, letting the flames flicker, Haurchefant sighed a little. "My desires beneath this cloak are on hold, until those I live for return to the Lifestream.

...Though I know my current form is not reassuring for you, nor our wonderful friends."

[mostsplendid]

Haurchefant cants his head a bit to the side not quite following some of the things that are being said. But he would have to assume that Gridanians are kinder or at least more accepting than Ishgardians. He simply doesn't know any... He would have liked to. He would have liked to have seen the Twelveswood and many other things out there beyond the land of snow.

The Warrior painted such vivid pictures of the places she'd gone and all she'd seen. Every story held his attention and captivated him to the point where he could almost believe he'd been there himself.

"So you're watching over them until then?" If he could do something similar he most certainly would. But it also seems so unbearably sad. To be so close but always so far. He's not sure his heart could stand that. Watching but never helping. Seeing all the dangers those he cherishes face and being unable to stand by their side. The knight in him would not and could not allow it. He has to be there. He needs to be there.

Because he loves all those people. His comrades. His Warrior of Light. His family. His dearest most cherished friends. How can he let them face the world alone? To only watch and risk them getting hurt or worse...

Haurchefant has not lingered terribly much on what has happened to him only that it has happened. But each passing moment and conversation brings the fact of the matter ever closer and it gets harder and harder to be fine with. There are consequences for the choices you make. Even the right ones. And the good ones. And the selfless ones. And you must live with them to whatever end it may bring. He made a choice. And now he is here and unable to go anywhere else. It twists an turns and fills the knight with a sorrow that is most unbecoming of him. It's an emotion he would not let anyone else see but as it is just him and someone who is also him by this fireside it seems alright.

"That is no life..." The Elezen says softly, bringing a hand up to his eye for just a moment. "Waiting for all that you cherish to pass beyond reach. A sorrowful continuation of a life like that is not what they would have wanted for us. Have they not suffered enough grief on our behalf? Would we not ease that burden by living as best we can in this ever so odd present?"

[emet_selch]

"There is no way I could... let them know I lived, without losing this flesh. It would hurt them more then this hurts me." Besides. He was basically immortal - even if he'd heard of how to kill an Ascian, if he remained hidden... well. He wanted to help. But there was nothing he could do that would not break their heart. Any of their hearts. Softly, his lips curved into a smile once more.

Like it or not, Emet-Selch and Haurchefant were one and the same now. The desires of the ancient Ascian were now aligned with the child who died - and had developed so very similar to the man who also sat by the fireplace. If only a little twisted, due to the lack of understanding the Ascian had on how Spoken were meant to be.

"...I do not wish to return to the cold, however. Not unless I am needed - and my Master always found my methods queer." Giving those who summon Primals horses for sacrifice? So that if they're slayed, the horses are given to others? It's not a plan that Elidibus either approves of or understands. "If this is an eternal new existence, then it shall be kind for all if we stayed."

Why did he include himself in that? Because Haurchefant then began to smile wider. "If there are truly multiple Warriors of Light, then it shall be quite a task to make sure all of them know their worth, will it not? Know how radiant and splendidly they walk in that accursed Light-- it shall be quite a task to aid them all in relaxation!"

[mostsplendid]

The other him raises excellent points. If Warriors of Light are coming and going then he must be there to help dry all the tears. He feels like he's been stained with so many already... All their sorrows weigh so heavily on his heart that it is a burden that has to be shared if he wishes to continue on.

Their pain at his passing... it hurts more than he could have ever imagined.

"You are not wrong... help them we should and will. But I must admit... My heart aches in knowing that when they return to a world that I can no longer be a part of they will forget." So said the letter. "It grieves me in a way that I cannot and will not admit to them but..." The Elezen wraps his arms around his middle trying to find words and be the pillar of strength that all have needed him to be. And while it has been an exciting few days and meeting all these lovely Warriors it has also been hard. And emotional. And he can not join the sorrows of those he has brought grief upon. It is not in his right to do so.

"It is not the matter of being forgotten. All things are eventually lost to time. But that they will be bereaved in sorrows once more despite all the healing done here. That is what hurts the most. It will be like these moments have not come to pass... and all sincerely spoken and loved will not have taken place at all. And they are the ones that have need of it the most."