"Don't you want to help me?" Hey, since this topic got a little weird, why not go full Monty and make it really weird. "I could always use another set of ears." At least this time it wouldn't require an actual physical sacrifice!

From Szel, anyway.

"None of the resulting tantrum, if there is in fact, rainbow-colored penis-shaped confetti in my house, is going to be my fault if it somehow magically ends up being in his hair.

That's all I care about."